Aah, true love. Does it exist? That wonderful feeling of comfortable, blissful butterflies-in-the-stomach, joy when you think of or see “the one”. That feeling of invincibility that that joy of being around them, gives you. And not forgetting that sense of security when you know that they only have eyes for you… True laaaav.
Of course, it exists! It may take a bit longer for some of us to find but it definitely does exist.
Believe it or not, relationships are not only in large part, a power play (whether obvious to you or not) but is also a compromise. If you love power so much that you never compromise, your relationship won’t work; and of course on the flip side, vice versa. I’m sure there are the exceptions, who actually seek out someone who controls everything, or someone who is submissive to everything – I am not referring to you here.
I am someone who loves a dominant man. Dominant in knowing what he wants, is sure of himself and who is able to hold a conversation with me both intellectual and silly. Dominant in knowing when to use aggression and when to use tenderness. I am a soft-spoken person but I do have a fairly dominant personality. Don’t ask me how that is possible – it just is. I am chilled on most things and I am fairly easy going but there’s a few things in life that I stand firmly on and if those things are not adhered to, then boy oh boy, will I speak my mind. Phew, WWIII style.
There are so many articles discussing the value of compromise. Let me tell you ladies, it is true! What they don’t tell you is that if your partner lacks the ability to recognize your compromising behaviour, then your efforts are gone to shit and actually counts for nothing! Your man may very well think that what you are doing isn’t compromise, its something that they deserve. Which may very well be the case. I mean, don’t get me wrong, our partners do deserve the best; BUT, if we have to make a compromise to afford them the best, a compromise that you would ordinarily not have been comfortable doing, but are comfortable doing in this case, for him, then that changes things.
Speak up, ladies (and gents).
This is where our differences, both as humans and in gender, comes into play. No matter how in tune we are with our partners, we will never truly know what they actually think or feel all the time. We think differently, we grew up in different circumstances and we are subjected to different life tests. How can anyone know what you’re thinking or feeling…without telling them? This is the importance of communication!
Gosh! I am by far one of the most closed booked people you will find. But I have learned, not only through my own experiences, but also through that of other couples; speaking to your partner goes hand in hand with a successful relationship. There’s no two ways about it! And no escape. Trust me.
Just try it. If you’re having problems in your relationship where you just cant get stop arguing, where both of you are just going back and forth and in circles, take a step back… breathe… tell them how you feel. Especially the men. If you open your mouth to say what hurts you and what helps you, it opens up a whole new level of intimacy in a relationship. Super sayan level of communication equals happier couples.
So, to answer the question: “How DO you get your man to do what you want?” Well, it’s simple. Reciprocate 🙂
But don’t forget to master “The Look”. (I’ve spoken about this on Instagram). They’ll know what it means and so will you when he gives it to you. 🙂
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ToxicSweety over and out